WHEN QUITTING ISN'T FAILURE

Jun 9
4 min read

There is a story in the Book of Ruth that introduces us to Naomi and her family. Their story begins like this.

In the days when the judges ruled in Israel, a severe famine came upon the land. There lived a man from Bethlehem in Judah called Elimelech who left his home with his wife Naomi and two sons Mahlon and Kilion and went to live in the country of Moab. They were Ephrathites from Bethlehem in the land of Judah. Elimelech died, and Naomi was left with her two sons. The two sons married Moabite women; Orpah and Ruth. But about ten years later, both Mahlon and Kilion died. This left Naomi alone, without her two sons or her husband. Then Naomi heard that the Lord had blessed his people in Judah by giving them good crops again. So Naomi and her daughters-in-law got ready to leave Moab to return to her homeland so they set off took the road that would lead them back to Judah. But on the way, Naomi said to her two daughters-in-law, “Go back to your mothers’ homes. And may the Lord reward you for your kindness to your husbands and to me. May the Lord bless you with the security of another marriage.” Then she kissed them good-bye, and they all broke down and wept. “No,” they said. “We want to go with you to your people.” But Naomi insisted they return to their parents’ homes. So the second time, they wept together, and Orpah kissed her mother-in-law good-bye. But Ruth clung tightly to Naomi. Naomi tried to make Ruth see reason but Ruth was determined to stay. She replied, “Don’t ask me to leave you and turn back. Wherever you go, I will go; wherever you live, I will live. Your people will be my people, and your God will be my God. Wherever you die, I will die, and there I will be buried. May the Lord punish me severely if I allow anything but death to separate us!” So when Naomi saw that Ruth was determined to go with her, she said nothing more (Ruth‬ ‭1‬:‭1‬-‭18‬ ‭NLT‬‬).

Many people read this and may think why didn’t Orpah stay? Was she not determined enough? That’s the same question I’ll ask you today: “why do you choose to leave things? Is it because you’re not determined enough?”. Sometimes the answer to that isn’t that the person isn’t determined enough, it’s because there’s a limit their strength can take them. And it is always good to know what you can handle and what you cannot. Because saying yes to something you haven’t been called to do can break you, it can drain you, and it can make you resentful. That’s why this story showed us three things. Three lessons that are worth taking note of.

THREE PROMPTS:

Naomi first asked them to leave. At that point, leaving her would have seemed heartless. Her husband and sons had died, and their husbands had died too. It made sense to think, "We're all suffering the same loss, so we should stay together." Sometimes being with people who share our pain can provide comfort and support. But sometimes we remain in places or situations we were never meant to stay in because we feel guilty. We feel bad, or we think we owe someone something. As a result, we stay when we should have left. That is what seems to be happening when Naomi first asked them to leave.

Then the second prompt. At this point, Orpah knew she couldn’t go on this journey anymore. This is the point of realisation. Naomi said “think about this situation very well. Why do you really want to come? I have nothing to offer anymore. I can’t marry because I’m old, and even if I do and give birth, you cannot wait that long till they grow”. Like she was being very real. (Ruth‬ ‭1‬:‭11‬-‭13‬ ‭NLT‬‬ paraphrased). Orpah stood there and thought, yes she might be right. Let me go to a place where I know I can still find something to do. And she’s not evil for that. In fact, I commend her on that because she knew she could not survive what was ahead. She didn’t have the capacity for that. Sometimes it's okay to walk away. It doesn't always mean you lack faith; sometimes it means you're being honest about what you're willing and able to commit to. Because faith is what carries you through what you cannot yet see. Half-hearted faith can leave you stranded along the way. Orpah wasn't ready to continue a journey whose purpose she couldn't yet see or fully understand.

Then the third prompt comes when Naomi tried to persuade Ruth to go back but Ruth knew what she wanted. She knew which path she wanted to go. She was unsure about the future but sure about her decision. Sometimes we take certain steps and we are unsure how that will end but we believe it can end somewhere. Some people have the capacity to endure longer than others. Your job looks like it’s crashing and everyone is leaving but you have this belief in you that things can change, so you stay. It may not make sense to anyone, even yourself. It doesn’t make you stupid. Ruth staying was not only determination, it was also covenant love and surrender to God. Orpah chose security and familiarity; Ruth chose covenant and uncertainty. Neither decision came cheaply.

We live in a generation now where people think quitting is a negative thing but quitting in the middle of something you haven’t been called to do is better than forcing yourself to finish just so you can prove that you’re done. We need to know when to ask God if we should continue or if we should stop. Our problem most times is we ask God when to start but we never ask God in the middle if we should continue or stop. We assume just because God told us to start, we have to finish. The issue isn't that God changed His mind but we're imperfect, so we can stray from His path. That’s why praying, reading the Word and meditating can help you know the will of God for your life. Open yourself up for God to surprise you and you’ll succeed in the things Abba has for you. God richly bless you!